Sol and Sophia – and the tool I don’t have in my studio.

This week let me just share these little babes that live with me. Sol and Sophia. They are my sister’s cats but live in my house. As Luna, the third one that doesn’t appear on this picture because should be sleeping somewhere.
oh, yes, and the four Lhasa Apsos too, the bullings that never leave the cats totally alone. grrrr.
This photo was taken by my sister Roberta.This is an excuse to post. A good excuse I believe. As I haven’t painted. The weather here is unbearable already and I can’t think of anything….. just to survive and forget it all.
Well, I have had other activities too. Good ones, profitable ones, healthy ones….. nothing bad.It happens from times to times. I spent a couple of weeks or even months not painting. It doesn’t mean I don’t think about it everyday. But isn’t a bad thing.
First of all, the eye never stops to work and improve itself even when I am not paying attention. It is always learning from light and textures around. Once you start to paint it never leaves your veins, is like a mortal virus. hahahah.  Your brain will in some level always relate what you see to how it could become a pictorial value.
Then it is good because, well… I am not a factory and not even an artist that produces for commercial reasons, so I have the privilege to only produce when I do have something really relevant to express, when it is pumping under my skin almost exploding demanding to take the world.
It makes the works have a real meaning and do not become only one more aesthetical excuse to fulfill a market. The world has already so many artworks…. and such few works that mean something for real in our lives.
If there is a thing this world doesn’t need is one more artist producing more and saying less.
That isn’t me.
Well, you that have followed my work through the years know already I always comply my promises of offering sincere paintings, real art for real people.
So let’s wait and see what happens. Everyday I say to myself that tomorrow I will paint, but the next day arrives and I feel it isn’t the right time.It isn’t like waiting for inspiration. I don’t like that policy. I believe in getting into the studio and work hard till make it happens. Inspiration is an excuse for quitters. Or  is for designers, conceptual artists who work with ideas not feelings.
What I am saying is;  I am not going to produce till I have all the reasons that make me move forward ripping my arm’s skin off.
Maybe tomorrow.Other thing is… well… here comes a little bit of rant…and no, I am not putting the blame on the others…….. Doesn’t matter how many thousands of people all over the world see your work, at the end you only paint for the ones around you. These are the people you want to please, to tell the truth,  to show yourself off or to prove a point.
Lately I have only met nice people, but so boring. People that make me feel like to offer nothing, not even my best… the Bible says to do not throw pears to the pigs, they won’t know what to do with it and will turn thenselves against you… I kind of feel like that.
How can someone produce and give its best when the world around him despises it?
You can say as much as you want that you produce only for yourself and don’t care for the rest of the world. Repeat this thousands of times till start to believe.  And it is good, it can even be true. But you wouldn’t be producing if you were the only person on Earth, you want to reach people, and you do want to have them liking your work in some level.
I need to get rid of this people I have lived with these last two months, as I said, they are nice and I like them, but their lack of interest by life, truth, beauty….. is suffocating me.
I have had contact with then because of business… I need this to pay my bills, so I can’t just say good bye and leave. I need to get rid of them in my head, to forget their presence is relevant in my life. This is maybe the tool is lacking in my studio. To forget these specific people and paint for me and for people at the other side of the world that still care somehow for what I do. Or I should have imaginary friends.

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