Painting, Dream, Free, Deer, Blood, Jesus, Nazis, Nephilim, Experiences, German, Brazilian, English. It is getting clear now.


I’ve made very few revisions on small details of this post that is the most important of my life as a painter… people didn’t realise this, and shouldn’t…. but after this, posted in the end of 2012, I stoped to paint for a while … .. what makes this little series definitive.   …… to people who says I never finish anything…..

Yesterday I was talking to my dear friend “golden angel” and all of sudden my last paintings have been much clear to me, the meanings and the facts surrounding them.
Below is the explanation I gave to her about what have happened these days in my studio and explanation about the last 4  or 5 paintings I’ve made:
—————————————————-
I spent the entire morning in the studio burning my brain to figure out a way to compose what I have in mind. I think I got.
One or two nights ago I had many dreams, weird ones. I woke up the whole night because of them… not nightmares, only weird. In the morning I woke up and started to write a dialog. I want to write this dialog on the canvas after to finish the painting. It is weird and quite evil but has a good end. It is about Jesus, Nazis, the Nephilims (Giants) of the book of Genesis, genetic experiences, sex, blood lines, South America, but all very condensed in very few lines and I don’t think people will notice it all. But will all be there very clear. I can’t explain. The title of the work will be Stag, following the works I am doing where I write words deer related….. venison, fawn, doe and now stag. I see this dialog as a way to show I got rid of all the past and devils haunting my life.
  • venison was about flesh, its influences in our acts and lives,  and the fact I am eating meat now.
  • fawn, like a rebirth, a new hope and life.
  • Doe was about fatality of life, the nature of the women and female.
  • Stag will be about blood. The blood of Jesus, the blood lines described in the Bible from Adam to Jesus and the nephilims’ descendent, and the nazis experiment and ideals about a perfect blood line and the contemporary concept about transhumanism…… blood in general, the animal blood in us and the importance it has had during all the History including to God.
———————below is the dialog I intend to work on my next painting —————————————————————–
Stag  – A South American dialogue between a Traditional Nazi ( Joseph Mengele’s assistant’s granddaughter ) and a Reborn Fundamentalist Christian painter. – Penis, neck and chest used to bleed like a hunted stag. – It has been a trophy, Mein Lieber. – Eu, Ich.. I mean, I am not. – Isn’t you who decidesss. – Warum werent sie verhaftet, wenn in diesem Teil der Welt angekommen? Desse lado do mundo ? – Speak only the devil’s language which came from North. – Eu don’t know it very well…prefiro na lingua que eu penso. – Isn’t you who choosesss. But for your comfort, me neither. – Why weren’t they arrested when arrived to this side of the world? – Their services and knowledge seemed to please and satisfy all parts involved here. – Does my blood belong to their blood line? – Nein, you came from their victims. – Am I one of their experiments? – Sie sind nicht. – Because I had one very strong genetic characteristic of their experiments. – If you say so… let’s call it a coincidence. – Coincidence isn’t a very scientific or spiritual term, is it? And stop to play with your thighs in front of me. – I know your weakness. – You are not the Frau I am supposed to take. – Oh, I am sorry. Are you supposed to take only one now? We both know you don’t like this rule, Stag. – When Jesus called I answered. Now I am washed in His blood. They can’t touch me anymore. – Blood blood blood. It is all about blood….. and blood lines. – Not even you are able to touch me. Stop to hunt. Nobody can. – It is all about blood line. Has been since from the very beginning, from Adam. – I don’t care. I am free. Eu sou livre. – Stag. – He made me much more than this. Essa foi nossa ultima conversa e contato. Eu te lanço no abismo, Nephilim, junto com sua suastica. ( That was our last conversation and contact. I throw you into the abyss, Nephilim*, along with your swastika ).
*The Nephilim were the “sons of God” ( fallen Angels ) who took the “daughters of men” according to Genesis 6:4, and generated a new breed not approved by God.

 

Advertisements
Image

23; one to six that’s my number.


23; one to six that's my number.

23; one to six that’s my number.
23; one to six that’s my number.

passing under saguis – eke eke eke… read Ecclesiastes


Feeling the taste of every texture in the air. It is so hot. All thoughts melt under the weather.
No purpose before or after each step. So I ride… the stag any hunter will ever catch.
Nowhere is a place too close, I go further.
Here is the body in heat ready for the Rapture, the spirit ready for Heaven and today’s dreams ready to be left behind with its vanity.

This house is going to be mine soon, I don’t know how but it will.

A list of things to do.
A list of things to hate.
A list of things to juuuust dislike.
Nothing ever changes and oh Lord I am still so blessed.
Saguis and micos and capivaras and my bicycle among trees when I am fast enough to escape the buildings.

South America is calling: don’t understand what it says, “no hablo su idioma”.
Rest of the world is calling: avoid to listen, it is ugly and desperate.” you lie and didn’t treat me well, you can’t say anything anymore”.
Mein Welt is calling: ich bin Der Welter Koning, but I am tired to dream.
God is calling: Sir, i’ve done what i could, sorry, it isn’t good enough, i know. please keep your hand on my life, hope you still love me.

last night I saw a picture of a nice guy from rio de janeiro, was an early 60’s image of a bossanova young man in his swimwear, no shirt or shoes or ornaments, riding a bicycle on the beach in front of the sea under the summer’s brazilian sun, smiling and looking to the girls in bikinis. The bike had high handlebars which allowed him to be very erect on the saddle, proud and enjoying the beautiful landscape as the world belonged to him. the image had dignity and made me happy.
but I  laughed when I compared with my situation here Sao Paulo 50 years later riding a bicycle all dressed up in the crazy traffic of congested avenues and on the high speed roads. speeding up to save my life, focused on a target, not looking to the sides, curved over drop bars, curved over my own body, trying to overcome myself in every second. no rest, no mercy for failures. reaching for blessings and building new ways.
I ride my bike the exactly same way I paint. the exactly same way I pray.

And when I talk about my painting process I always start saying:” so I woke up early this morning and went to  the studio……”
So I woke up early this morning….
to pedal hard, and harder. eke eke eke, to sweat all the toxins, and the good things too, to expel the world, all the references, thoughts and feelings. To expel myself.
expel myself expel myself.
emptiness.
emptiness towards eternity.

So when you ask me if I am painting or working.
no, yes, well… to me there is absolute no difference between to paint to pray and to ride a bicycle.

was made a being with bifocal sight and capacity to build.
use different weapons to reach the same target.
am a stag among trees and streets but I am a hunter.
to know myself, to overcome myself, to get rid of myself. towards God.

what difference does it make… what I am doing?
as everything done on this world is only vanity.
Read Ecclesiastes.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ecclesiastes+1&version=KJV

————————————————————————————

( image of the sagui taken from this site : http://scienceblogs.com.br/xisxis/2011/11/saguis-bonitinhos-mas-ordinarios/  )

Image

Caio Fern, acrylic on canvas .


Caio Fern, acrylic on canvas .

Image

Green pasture for the flock. Caio Fern, 2013 , acrylic on canvas.


Green pasture for the flock. Caio Fern, 2013 , acrylic on canvas.

this work is so lame on the photo but so cute on my wall…. and the sheep have such nice red details… ok then.

Green pasture for the flock. Green for everybody !!!! yey !!!

Image

Landscape in red and flesh. Caio Fern, 2013 , acrylic on canvas.


Landscape in red and flash. Caio Fern, 2014 , acrylic on canvas.

just a pretty little landscape to look while having my tea.

It is tea time, Linda… really, it is tea time, don’t make me wait .

Image

a little bit of blue sky upon the roofs for us. Acrylic on canvas, Caio Fern , 2014 .


a little bit of blue sky upon the roofs for us. Acrylic on canvas, Caio Fern , 2014 .